So much to say ... so little time

I have so much to say and write about, but I sit in front of the page ... and ... nothing!! But, let me try and make an attempt as I am likely to forget all that I want recorded.

I met my new oncologist the other day and so far, I think I am going to get on with her. She spent more than an hour with me and listened to ME and why I want to stop treatment. I tried my hardest to not turn it into a bitching session, but unfortunately there were a few gripes I just had to get out and let go of .. and I did feel a whole lot better after having someone actually listen to me.

She looked at me and my treatment as a whole person and not just number 2099 - the cancer patient needing chemo. I really appreciated that. In a nutshell, she goes with my decision of not continuing with chemo on the condition that I pass a few tests that were never done. Those tests are today - bone density, other blood tests, etc. I shall know my fate tomorrow although I will still need to do radiotherapy and hormone therapy.

She was just a little concerned that there was a slight spike in my bloods the last time around, but she thinks it might be because I still (embarrassingly enough) smoke!

We better hope that I don't need to continue with the chemo now, because if I do, it means that the tests came out negative and I have cancer elsewhere. But that ain't going to happen!! I just feel it in my bones.

I also saw the guynie 2 weeks back who informed me that the hormone therapy I will be going on is high risk for uterus cancer and it is strongly suggested that I have a hysterectomy before the year is out. My oncologist confirmed this. My uterus is apparently the size of a 3 month pregnancy, which is not good as the fybroids she detected 6 months ago have not disappeared and my walls have thickened.

Anyways, I have so much to say now that I am on a roll, but have to get Jordan off to school in a very welcomed downpour of rain - a relief from the sweltering heat wave we have been experiencing (.)(.)